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Friends And Family
Conversations from the studios of God's Way Radio in Miami, FL.
WAYG-LP | 104.7FM
Friends And Family
Joey And Tiffany's Journey from Friendship to Faith-Filled Marriage
Embarking on a love story rooted in faith and friendship, Tiffany and I share our testimony, how the Lord brought us together. From the fond memories of our friendship that started at church to the moment we knew God had destined us to be together, we share the nuances of a courtship that patiently flourished in His perfect timing. Our narrative is not just ours alone; it's punctuated by echoes of wisdom from those who walked before us, shaping a tale that's both uniquely personal and relevant.
As we navigated our way from friendship to marriage, we found that the single years were a canvas for spiritual growth, painted with service and contentment. Our conversation spans the societal tug-of-war between singleness and the pursuit of marriage, exploring how the latter gains depth and meaning when one's life is already full and content in Christ.
We also reflect on the cultural shifts and their influence on modern relationships. Our story is a mosaic of lessons in setting boundaries, the art of surrendering to God's plan, and the joy found in mutual pursuit of a Christ-centered marriage. Whether through the anticipation of a quick wedding or the everyday rhythm of married life, our discussion underscores a singular truth: that every step, every challenge, and every blessing is a testament to the Lord's enduring grace and guidance.
You're tuned in to Friends and Family, a God's Way Radio exclusive where we introduce you to some amazing people. In John, chapter 15, verse 15, jesus says I have called you friends for all things that I heard from my Father I have made known to you. That's our aim that God would be made known to you. Stay with us until the end of our conversation for more information on this program and other unique offerings from God's Way Radio.
Joey:Joey here, I have the joy of producing this podcast, and what you're going to hear now is the story of me and my wife Tiffany, how we were friends for a long time, began a relationship together, got engaged and then married. And just to give you a little bit of context, these recordings were actually two Friday live radio programs that we've stitched together to make one podcast so that you guys can listen all the way through. With that, let's get started. We were friends for a while before, you know, that relationship part came about. We met, I guess we met in church, first at Bible study. I started coming to Calvary and Christmas 2008, I think was my first service and you've been here since long before that.
Tiffany:Yeah, I've been coming since 19,. I think 10 years before that, actually 1998 or 97. And yeah, we were friends. I guess that means we were friends for quite a few years because we didn't. Our relationship didn't really start until 2015. And we didn't at least from my perspective, we didn't like each other. We didn't have feelings right off the bat for each other.
Tiffany:So I always really appreciate that part of our stories that we really did have a great opportunity to kind of build a foundation as just friends first, without all of those. It's so tricky when you like someone and you're trying to be friends with them, because those feelings just are so they get in the way and it's so hard to like, question your motives for, okay, why did I choose?
Tiffany:to go on this trip and why did I choose to say this or that, and the advice I usually give to people is don't tell them you like them. You know, hold off, hold off and I remember having that rule for myself as well when, when we finally, when I finally did start having feelings for you so we were going to bible study for a while, and then I started working at the church in late 2010, December 2010.
Joey:And so then we saw each other every day pretty much except Thursdays, except, I'm sure, probably most, not most, but a lot of Thursdays.
Tiffany:We ended up seeing each other as well.
Joey:So we would work at the office Monday, tuesday, wednesday, friday, see each other at church on Wednesday night. So we would work at the office Monday, tuesday, wednesday, friday, see each other at church on Wednesday night Also. We used to have a Bible study Saturday nights and then Sundays at church. So we saw each other almost every day. And then I know for my part, at least as a young man, you know there was that eagerness to get married, eagerness to be in a relationship and, by God's grace, he really guarded me, he really guarded my friends, our sisters in the church.
Joey:But there was still that, you know, I think a lot of young guys go through it, but maybe not. But that I think I like this person, I think I like that person, I like this person, I like you know both of these people, lord. Which one is it? You know? Is that my wife? Is that my wife? You know? Uh, and I think you know whether they want to admit or not, I think a lot of young guys, maybe young ladies, maybe you've spoken with other ladies and that could be sometimes the lens you could look through. Um, when you, you know, your eyes aren't totally focused on the lord, I don't know if you or or friends that you had in that time and age group experience the same thing, or maybe it's just guys or yeah, and you know it's not to say that it's wrong to like somebody, or or even you know, find yourself, um, you know, oh wait, this person, okay, maybe, no, maybe not like kind of that.
Tiffany:It's not necessarily anything wrong with that, um, as long as you you just kind of give all of that to the lord and not not follow your heart as the world is always telling us to do and I think I I want to try to mention that at least once tomorrow as well um, to kind of counteract that message, but making sure that the way you view those people first and foremost is, you know, that's that's god's daughter, that's god's son and that might be actually somebody else's wife or husband. So I better really be careful, even though I might have feelings for them, that I am treating them, you know, with respect, keeping in mind that years later, you know they I might, you know I might run into them again, right run into them and meet their husband, meet their wife and knowing that I was able to treat that person with respect.
Joey:That's so important, man, you touch on some really important stuff. If you just tuned in, it's 3.51 or thereabouts. And I'm here with Tiffany, my lovely wife, and she does so much behind the scenes of the radio and so many other ministries, and not even behind the scenes in all of them. She, she serves in children's ministry at church. So she's there and in the front of the scenes. Front of the scenes, that's not a phrase. She's there. Uh as uh, you know I'm gonna go way off the tangent here, tiff, as you started serving again in in babies. Um, it's so cool how the lord has kind of like brought things together. Like one of the stories is when you saw a mom that you had just taken care of her kid in baby's ministry, at the park or something.
Tiffany:Yeah, recently, recently, I just started serving and taking care of the babies in children's ministry and I saw I recognized we were at a park, me and my, our youngest, and I recognized the baby but not the mom and I was like, oh, is that? And I said you know the baby's name so and so, and she's like yes, how do you know she?
Joey:has a phone dialing.
Tiffany:No, I'm like. Oh, I took care of him on Sunday and that was just really sweet to be able to connect with her. She was new in town.
Joey:Super cool so. So, sometimes in the front lines behind the scenes that was the point of that tangent, but um. So whenever I can, I try to get her here in the studio with me and trying to see if we can make this a regular thing. We're praying, we're watching, we're seeing what doors the lord had opened so she was able to come today, and we're talking about a couple things. We're going to continue to just plug and preview tomorrow morning. Threads of grace for saturday of the month.
Joey:She'll be here, uh, for tomorrow's live episode, along with alicia and isa yeah um, and then we're also kind of talking about just our story, you know, just growing in the lord and and um, and just uh, you know, when you, when you do like that person, and how do you approach it and how, what did god do with us? Uh, you know, I think one thing we would say tiff is man. There's no one way to do it right, I mean there's so many. Every story is unique yeah, I was sharing.
Tiffany:That was the reason I was kind of like, oh, we should do this topic, because I so love asking people. When I meet, you know, when we make friends with other married couples the first time, I always love asking how did you guys meet? Because every story is so different and unique, there are no two alike, which is nice in a way that there's no formula that we have to try and follow, because it forces us to kind of take it through prayer and rely on the lord and um, so I, and which you know. So, if anybody's listening, again, we want to hear, we actually want to hear your story as well, if you have a good one I mean, everybody has a good one, hopefully, but we want to hear your story. Or if your parents have a, you know, an exceptionally sweet one, or your grandparents or or something we would love for you to call in and let us know.
Joey:Um, that number is 786-313-3115, so call us or text us if you want to text. So wow, the echo was really loud because the door is open um. Where do we leave off?
Tiffany:So we were seeing each other almost every day because we worked together, and I was in that season where oh, I think I like this person, I think I like that person Wanting to get married.
Joey:Wanting to get married Not as focused on the Lord as I could have been, you know. It's so cool, though, how God's grace just covers it. You know, I think that, and again, all the credit goes to the Lord, all the credit goes to the Lord, but I was so busy about God's business I mean, I was serving at church, working at church, going to Bible studies.
Tiffany:At some point I even rented a house with a bunch of other guys from the church. You were working like three jobs at one point.
Joey:Yeah, in my senior year of college so my fourth year of college I had four jobs in addition to a full semester load. So four classes and four jobs. That's when I started drinking coffee, and the rest is history.
Tiffany:But it kept you out of trouble.
Joey:But the classes and the work kept me out of trouble, for sure, for sure. And living with four or five other Christian guys also kept me out of trouble.
Joey:So I think that, even though my focus wasn't totally perfectly where it needed to be and I did get distracted with but I want to get married so badly sometimes, man, that's why you got to. I guess the way I would say is you got to have margins. You know, I'm going to aim really really high and I'm going to be really busy about the Lord's business, so when I do get distracted I don't get too far off course. Anything from your kind of like 20s that comes to mind. That's kind of like similar how you were focused on the Lord and it kept you from going off course. Yeah.
Tiffany:I tried to. Really, I saw, you know, I did have to kind of keep myself focused because obviously, you know, growing up I maybe not obviously, but I had a lot of like romanticized ideals and I did want to. You know, maybe not obviously, but I had a lot of like romanticized ideals and I did want to. You know, I had the dream of wanting to get married and and I thought and I remember my own mom's story was that she was married at 21. So I was like, oh, maybe that'll happen to me too, but I was here, I was like, you know, I think we got, I got married when I was 28.
Tiffany:Um but I was trying so hard not to despair and not to like, make that my main focus and not to. You know, I'm like. I know that what I need to do is be content in the Lord, Cause if I'm, if I'm not content with just the Lord right now, then I'm not going to be content, no matter who I marry, um, no matter how perfect he is and uh, and he's not, he's not going to be perfect.
Tiffany:So, I really need to be content with the Lord and um. So I remember trying to keep my focus on that Um, me see, I lost my train of thought. I, yeah, I was just, um, I also stayed busy. I oh, that's what I was gonna say. I really, now, looking back, I really cherish those years, um, of just serving as a single, and how much more available I was to just kind of like you know, yeah, sure, I can, I can be there and I can do that and I can go on these trips and I can just like it was just a hat I had.
Tiffany:I was an adult and I had this freedom to. You know no other kind of like obligations really, um, that I needed to do other than my own. You know work, that jobs that I was doing, um, to be able to to serve the Lord wholeheartedly, like Paul says in that verse. You know, like if I, if I would prefer, if everybody was single, because you know you do have that freedom, and so I really do cherish those years that I was able to do. That I don't regret at all. You know, the lord, the way, the story that the lord wrote for us, where I you know, waited until a little bit longer super, super cool.
Joey:So if anybody's listening, if you're single, uh be busy about the lord's business, serve uh.
Joey:And I think for guys especially, I don't know if you would have any any comment on this from your end, for for ladies or for yourself. You know, we got to be careful. It's not like I speak for all men or you speak for all ladies. Uh, I know that that sometimes can can irk people, uh, when you make generalizations, and then rightly so we shouldn't make generalizations, but I do think that a lot of men would benefit from and, I think, work like like physical work and and I didn't do a lot of physical work but but but being productive, you know.
Joey:So I had those four jobs in my in my last semester of school and it was, I mean, most of my days were 6 am to 11 pm. I mean I would work, go to school, go to another job, get to the library to study, you know, finish my papers, go to sleep, do it all over again, um, church in between or whatever it was. And man, I remember some some awesome times and and uh, just the lord, and just carrying me through and pulling all-nighters and and uh, just just yeah, I, you know there. So one of my jobs was a tutor at FIU, specifically for athletes, the Student Athletic Academic Center, s-a-a-c, I think something like that and I would tutor athletes and my major was religious studies, so I would literally be tutoring some kids in religion classes.
Joey:I'm like you handed me this on a silver platter, Like talk to them about Jesus, Anyway. So yeah, so that's chapter one. But so what's your thoughts about Jesus? You know, tell me more. It's like there's no way I can get in trouble for that.
Tiffany:We were studying for a religious class.
Joey:So, man, just amazing opportunity there and working at a christian high school and a couple hours, uh, uh, maybe not even an hour in the morning a day, and, um, man, just just really, really cool season, like you were saying I wouldn't trade it for the world. Um, so then you liked me first. No'm just kidding. At some point we liked each other, but we didn't just right away say something, or go for it.
Tiffany:Yeah, no, it definitely took a while. I remember for me I did not. You know, there were times where I would look around me. I'm like man, you know, I'm here past 25 years. Lord, who do you have for me? Did you feel pressure, like from others, to get like your? I'm here, I'm 20, past 25 years.
Joey:Lord, who do you have for me? And I never really Did you feel pressure like from others to get like your.
Tiffany:Let me think Did I, um, I don't remember there was pressure, but I don't know if I don't remember specific people who were like on top of me, except for maybe, um, uh, I don't know if I should name her. She's pretty. We stayed at her house a few times and she was always trying to match people up.
Joey:You guys probably some of you out there are listeners if you've met her you know who I'm talking about.
Tiffany:She's the og she was the only one I felt the most pressure from, but that was just always, you know she pressured everybody yeah, that didn't feel like that, like, like it wasn't a bad thing it was always fun anyway.
Tiffany:Um, yeah, there was one point where I was just it was. It just happened while I was serving, and this was one of like those very rare occasions when you hear the voice of the Lord. I didn't, I didn't hear an audible voice, but there was a voice in my heart that I knew. I'm like wait, I'm having a conversation with this voice, and I know that that's not me thinking this. I remember we were serving at a, a retreat. We were either breaking down or setting up or something, and you were. You were breaking down something, um, and I heard the lord say have you considered my servant, joey? And I was like what?
Joey:and on that we're gonna. No, I'm just kidding, we do have a call. Uh, good afternoon. Where are are you calling us from? You're live on God's Way Radio.
Caller:Yes, vero Beach Florida.
Joey:Oh.
Tiffany:Uh-oh.
Joey:Uh-oh, don't embarrass me.
Tiffany:Oh no. No, this is a good thing, no.
Joey:I just mean, I shouldn't have said that, dad. I just mean, I know you love us, that's all I meant. But go ahead.
Caller:All right. Anyways, I hope everybody's having a good Friday.
Caller:Yes, sir, thank you.
Caller:I didn't hear the topic, so I'm just calling in. You know, roth, and the Lord just put it in my heart to pray for the children of this world that are in these conflicts going on right now, that are in these conflicts going on right now.
Caller:The Holy Spirit just put it in my heart to please pray diligently for these innocent children, these innocent lambs that God has made and given life to, and that we have the free will that God has given us man, to do right or wrong in this world. And all I got to say is that we're very, very, very blessed to live still in a free country, but we also have the freedom to choose what we do. So it's very, very important spiritually of what we choose to do with that free will that God has given us.
Joey:Amen, do you want to lead us in a quick prayer?
Caller:Yeah, dear Lord. Father, I ask you, lord, to please put your arms and your anointing and your Holy Spirit around the hedge of protection of these children, father, that are in these places right now as we speak. It's just very overwhelming to me, father, when I look around and I just see what man has done with their free will. So I ask you for your forgiveness and your repentance, father, and whoever's listening is going through something on the radio waves today that you just have to look a little further and each of our own plights are own and personal in our own way, and we respect that, lord, but please look at the blessings that we still have in comparison to others in this world.
Joey:Amen amen, love you dad. Thank you, I think this is an appropriate time for that corny joke. You don't have to be related to us to call, you can call. I love when my dad, my mom, calls. I think my aunt called the other day or maybe she texted, I don't remember but it's always a joy when I know that family's listening and calling and it's super cool to share that with them. But our family at God's Way Radio we consider you friends and family and as you listen, you know some of you have been listening since day one.
Joey:This year, believe it or not, we'll be celebrating nine years of radio ministry in December, so it's amazing how time flies. Ministry um in december so it's amazing how time flies. So I encourage you call or text 786-313-315-786-313-315. We were talking about um, our story right, kind of how tiffany and I met, how we started courting and got married and what god's done in our lives. Just sharing testimonies of the work of God, the goodness of God, and also taking the time to preview and plug tomorrow morning, encouraging you guys to tune in. So, tiffany, tell us again whomever's listening about tomorrow morning.
Tiffany:Tomorrow morning at 10 am, threads of Grace will be live with our next episode on purity and honor, and so we're kind of taking that up, since I'm going to be maybe part of that topic and be sharing a little bit of our story. We decided today to kind of like give a joey tiffany perspective on it, but definitely tune in tomorrow because there's going to be a lot of stuff, um, that we're not going to be talking about today.
Joey:Tiffany's saving it. She's saving it for tomorrow, 10 am to 11 am, and that's the first saturday of every month, the live premiere of threads of grace. So we didn't say we liked each other right away. Uh, we were working together. Um, you had had heard from the lord at the retreat yes, yes.
Tiffany:So then the lord told me, you know, have you considered joey? And and I was like no, no way, lord. Like that was my first response. I was like no way, this is crazy. Like to me you were like um, because you were younger than me, I'm like he's just like a little brother to me and you know, he's like a goofy little brother I'm not. I would never see him that way.
Tiffany:And and then, but then I kind of like he didn't say anything else and I just kind of thought about it for a minute and I was like, oh my goodness, um, wait, this, maybe this, maybe, maybe I do have some feelings for him after all. And that's kind of like when I really acknowledged that I did have feelings for you. And then, you know, obviously right, I didn't, like, you know, go run and tell you right away, like we were saying, I, we. I think from that point it was about either it was about two years before anything actually really happened, it was just all up to you know, just praying through it. And, um, it was really difficult to not try to make things happen or kind of like, you know, manipulate a situation where drop hints yeah drop hints.
Tiffany:I'm like, no, if I really felt a conviction that I cannot be the one to initiate anything, you know, just because the lord told me to consider him, you know, that doesn't mean that I have to go run over there and, you know, start anything. So I'm going to just, I'm just going to wait and see what the Lord does and not initiate anything. And that was really hard to do, um, but I just tried so hard to like question every. You know my motives and quite like, why am I saying this and what's going on? And you know we were.
Joey:It was a little bit tricky sometimes to navigate through that because we were always together you know, always in a group setting, but always, you know, working together and stuff yeah and uh, I'm not asking to be sarcastic, I I I really want to hear your thoughts on it. Um, you know, you have this like model. That's not the word I'm looking for. You see it nowadays where, oh you know, ladies, you could do it too and give them your number and you ask him out, don't wait for him to ask you out. And I don't know, I don't know how prevalent that is in the church at large, I don't know if it is at all, but it sounds like you're pretty convinced that, across the board, ladies should, should, be the recipients and and wait for the guy to make the move.
Tiffany:I mean, that is probably the advice I would give to my own daughter. Now, you know, if somebody wants to call in and they might have a story, like I said, they're all different and they might have like a really great godly marriage where it just so happens.
Joey:I told him ask me out already yeah.
Tiffany:I told him first.
Joey:I'm sure there are stories like that.
Tiffany:I would love to hear one of those.
Joey:Well, we have somebody else on the line. Hey, good afternoon. Thank you for calling. Where are you calling from today?
Caller:City of Doral and Sweetwater.
Joey:All right represented, so what do you want to share?
Caller:Man, have you ever prayed for a prayer that God gave you all in one?
Joey:Well, she's sitting right in front of me. Okay, I had to be cute there. But what are you referring to my brother? I want to hear what God's doing.
Caller:I've been praying for a couple of prayers and this Wednesday night God put it all in one. First of all, you heard about it a couple of couple days ago. I spoke about the empty chair praying and everything yes now pray for somebody that was away from the Lord and wants to come back, you know, and that got us around one tonight, that prayer reason why he answered the prayer, because we and me and my nephew were getting ready to go to service and he came from work.
Caller:He was tired and he said, no, I'm not going because I'm tired and I don't have time. And I was in the same boat, he was, so I go. You know what? We're not gonna let the enemy attack. We're gonna go and yeah, and we went. He said yeah, I agree with you, I agree with you. And he goes. Thank you, because it's not always me helping you out, it's you encouraging me too, also sometimes when I'm falling down, you know. So we went.
Joey:I love that and wednesday was so special man yes, and then the message was right for him it was for me too yes, and especially the breaking of the bread and the wine.
Caller:And we were walking out after the service and he met a brother that was with him at rehab.
Tiffany:Wow.
Caller:And he was hugging him and said man, good to see you. I said, jesse, and I go, yeah, remember me. Yes, we were in rehab together. And I go, wow, man, they hugged each other, they got their numbers and I asked him the question I go, man, they hugged each other, they got their numbers and, and I asked the question, I go. But what happened, bro? Oh, I was far away from the Lord, but now I decided to come back. This was my church, was my church, but now it's going to be my church now and I go praise the Lord. Man, you know, I got into a trap and, man, I've been praying for somebody like that, not two, not three, even one person will be okay. And look, it happened.
Caller:It was a person that was far away from the Lord. He got caught into a sin, or whatever it was, and he came back to Jesus' feet. And that's a blessing. Now they get together, they're going to see themselves on Sundays and now he's going to encourage my nephew Jesse and get going to encourage him.
Joey:So it's a blessing and I just show you, guys, that every day, there's something different going on from the Lord, god's answering prayer. Man, yeah, I love it. You know, you actually made me think of something even related to just how the Lord brought Tiffany and I together and just how the Lord likes uh, you know how he does things in a godly way, so I'm going to kind of connect it back to it. But, man, we continue to pray for you, for Jesse, even for Mikey yes, mikey, and now Jesse's friend, man, awesome and who knows. Hey, jesse, if you're listening right now. Man, love you, bro, good to see you Wednesday and love seeing all you guys. Okay, hope to see you even soon again.
Caller:Okay, god bless you and have a great blessing day, and if you want to go to the beach, it's a good day to go to the beach tomorrow.
Joey:Hey, there you go, I like it, thank you, kind of like weather weekend update. Thank you.
Caller:A little barbecue ain't nothing wrong with that.
Joey:Bro, you know what I just did? That Monday of this week the office was closed and we did a little beach barbecue with the family, so it was good. I kind of burnt myself a little bit. I used too much charcoal, I think. Oh yeah, yeah, bro, awesome, I'll do that, thank you, thank you, god bless you. God bless you. Yeah, that was a lot of fun on Monday Tiff with the kids and some friends and family, and man man.
Tiffany:Now I'm hungry again though I'm thinking about this hamburger. You gotta stay focused, joey, okay where were we?
Joey:so we just got. We got a couple texts. Uh, somebody texting hey, remember threads of grace tomorrow. Yes, we're going to continue to, to, to look at and and and just remind everyone 10 am to 11 am tomorrow, threads of grace. We got another text. They said I've never heard you two share together at the same time. I think think it's only the second time we do this, so I'm praying that it could become more regular. We're praying about a schedule, a format, so you can pray with us. If you want to see it happen, well, we'll ask the Lord together about it. But today we're talking about kind of like our story. You know how the Lord brought us together and just to be a blessing, you know, to look at different aspects of friendship and marriage and God's timing, how he answers prayers, how he guides you, how he confirms things, and then also encouraging and inviting you to call or text to share your story. You know, I know somebody that texted us.
Joey:They just celebrated their one year anniversary and they have an amazing story and someone else that texted us there. They have an amazing story and, uh, someone else that texted us there. They have an amazing story, not only how they met their husband and and and everything, but now they're serving with their husband, they're working with their husband.
Joey:So they, they, um, they, they're working every day together as well, kind of like how we were so. So, man, just the lord, how he gives everyone, just an incredible testimony. But we didn't tell each other. You know, you saw me at the retreat and you know, when I mentioned, as a young man, having that distraction to put a word on it of wanting to get married, looking around, is that my wife. Oh, praying, praying, praying, praying, praying, get a wife, get a wife. You were one of those ladies that caught my eye. You know, oh god, is it her, is not her. So there was that, you know, like likability, attraction, crush, if you would there as well. So there was now like a mutual, you know, mutual feelings, still being friends, kind of navigating all that, and I'll let you tell it because you're probably more gracious about it. But uh, uh, there was a rough year there. There was a rough year it felt.
Tiffany:It did feel like a rough couple kind of years. Yeah, it was definitely like uh, um, but it was good. It helped to conform me more into the image of the lord, to go through this um season where I was just kind of um, lord, what is going on, and I don't know and and but, but the lord just telling me just sit, still, just sit, still, let me do something. I'm doing something like I don't, I don't know what he's, but he's not telling me what he's doing. Anyway, all that to say, there was finally a kind of sense that there was, the feeling was mutual, but I wasn't gonna say anything or imply anything and I was wondering man, is this guy going to say something? You know, because sometimes you know the, the interactions or the things he would say. I'm like, well, now, after that, he's got to say something. You know he's got to. Why did he say that? Why did he do that? You know he's he's got to like is there? You know he's, he's going to. He can't do that without you know, kind of declaring something.
Tiffany:Lesson to the guys guys, don't play with a woman's heart, it is not godly. So, um, after, but sometimes, even like man, I like I deserve an apology, I deserve an explanation. No, no, no, lord. You know, lord telling me just sit, still, sit, still. So having to give that to the lord and waiting, and the lord, you know, he took care of it. Our I, I always like how I do, actually like that. The very first conversation we had about anything remotely, you know, our feelings toward each other began with an apology, began with forgiveness, which is how our story with the Lord begins. That relationship with the Lord begins with forgiveness and that's how our story began. So we had one conversation at a. You asked me to meet at that one, wendy's over there by the old began.
Joey:So we had one conversation at our Wendy's.
Tiffany:You asked me to meet at that one Wendy's over there by the old church and we had some other friends with us there for accountability and we all sat together.
Joey:Super awkward, but it had to be done. You know, I wanted to start off on the right foot, I wanted to clean the slate, in a sense. So we said, hey, you know, we're going to sit at the table with you guys. So we said, hey, you know, we're going to sit at the table with you guys that were sitting right there at the table with us. I apologize, you know, in front of our friends and just wanted them to bear witness and, like you said, accountability.
Tiffany:And then you said it was funny because you apologize, but you didn't really say what for?
Tiffany:I just said oh, I apologize for the way I've been treating you, because you, I don't really know, and I was like at that point, I'm like all right, lord, I felt like a green light. I'm like this yeah, no, ma lord on, like I asked you because he brought it up. I'm like what are you apologizing for? Because you're not sure about what. What are you not sure about? Let's get this elephant in the room, that's been, I've been living with for the last two years out in the open.
Joey:I. So I said I'm not sure and again I was like whatever I get, like I deserve it, you know. So I said fair question. I said I'm not sure if the Lord wants me or is telling me or leading me to pursue you, to be in a relationship with you, to move forward or anything like that.
Tiffany:And I've been kind of doing that and leading you on and flirting and that's, you know, not right and so I'm sorry and so that's what I'm talking about and which is not what I expected, because when you asked me for a meeting, I thought, oh, maybe he could be finally telling me like, hey, you know, I, I like you, let's start a relationship together. So that's what I thought it was. But it wasn't that it was. You know, you were apologizing for that and telling me you weren't sure so this is not at all why it's been like, oh, he's not sure.
Tiffany:So then you know, I give, I gotta give credit to the holy spirit for my response, which was that okay, well, if you're not sure, then let's, let's just not. You know text anymore, let's not talk anymore, you know, let's just not. Let's kind of put, almost put like she put me on ice ice put our friendship on pause until you figure it out down until you figure that out, you know, unless so, that's until further notice.
Joey:There's not gonna be any more, you know and you know again, I, I love how you even said it, giving credit to the lord, because you, it wasn't a manipulation tactic, it wasn't, it wasn't leverage.
Tiffany:I didn't feel like any kind of like meanness toward you.
Joey:I'm just like well, I think this is what makes sense, yeah but you look back at the wisdom of it and here's, here's, here's why I gave that whole preface, because it is ladies, right, I'm thinking, here's what I was, what I was going for ladies, don't a guy. So, okay, let me say, let me finish the, the, that part of the story and then come back and try to make a principle out of it. So I left that meeting and I thought, man, okay, you know, yeah, god, yeah, I'm praying, okay, yeah, I, yeah, I deserve that, whatever. And then I realized, out of these, all these girls that I think I might like, or I'm praying about, quote unquote, which you know, that's just code for you know, young man, that doesn't know what he wants, you know, I leave that meeting and I realize Tiffany's the one girl that I can't.
Joey:You know, now, it sounds corny or whatever, but I can't spend the rest of my life not talking to. Oh, no, you know, she is the one. I didn't realize it till just now. Oh god, help me fix this. Um, and then that started kind of like the next chapter. But there's a principle there that if the girl is, you know, always after the guy, even if you know she's in a gray area, I'm not pursuing, I'm not, but but always you know quick to answer, always there you know if, if, if, if there needs to be a separation not even a break, because it was like a breakup but not a breakup but if there needs to be that, separate.
Tiffany:But you see what I'm saying like, I think that's, there's a general principle there was a healthy distance that needed to happen, and it's this is needs to be that separation. But you see what I'm saying. I think there's a general principle there. There was a healthy distance that needed to happen, and this is not to be confused with playing hard to get or leading him on or anything like that, because then that implies manipulation, like I'm trying to get him to do something which I wasn't at that point. What it was was discretion I think was needed at that point. We need to be more discreet, we need wisdom in this moment. So that's what ladies need to have discretion, not just like, oh, let me play hard to get, because then you admit you're playing a game.
Joey:You just dropped a bomb right there. That's wisdom. Because you think about a stereotype. This is not all ladies, but a stereotype. I'm trying to be as respectful as possible, but I'm also trying to be a blessing Right and really speak on real issues. You think of a stereotype of the girl that's always on social media or always taking pictures of herself, or always. I think that's not necessarily discretion Right, maybe, maybe discretion right, maybe, maybe now. Now I need your help here. I mean that that's a stereotype of you're. You know you're always.
Tiffany:It's about you and online and this, and I mean if she's sharing a whole lot about herself and her private life and if the pictures are very like you know, revealing a lot about you know her physically and personally, those those could be things that maybe you could save for your future husband probably and and then, when it comes to so that's online, right, which we have this weird disassociative thing with like, oh, it's online, it's different from real life.
Joey:Online is real life people yeah, it's real, has real implications, real consequences. Um, so, taking that to like interpersonal relationships too right. Like you don't need to say everything you don't need to. Like you know, bare your heart to every. Like you know what, just just you know, keep your cards close and and and let the lord do it. You know, talking about people online and stuff, there's one person I think they do a really good job. I don't care for social media. You know that, obviously, kind of neither of us do, but there's this one person that I think does a good job of it. When they come back from family vacation, it's almost like they give you a recap, like they take you on vacation with them the way they put the pictures and they write the caption.
Joey:They actually texted us. If they're still listening, I want them to know I give them props. They do. I think they do that very well and it's like oh, I feel like I went on the trip with them, you know.
Joey:So it's really neat to see people do it well and the focus is always the Lord and you see a lot of their family and the joy that they had there. So it's cool when people are able to do it well. So I apologize, I realize, man, I'm in love with this girl. I need to win her back. I need to get this right. Until you lost it, I didn't know what I had until I lost it that is absolutely true in my case or almost lost it, or kind of lost it. Um, so you know and tiffany mentioned it you know she was in her late 20s and and so this isn't like high school boyfriend, girlfriend stuff anymore. This is, this is real life. I mean, she was a, you know, she was a leading professor at a university, master of linguistics, english of majors, yes, the major of all English.
Tiffany:I was working as a professor at the time.
Joey:So we were both adults and so I wanted to treat her as such, and so I said OK, you know, when I go back to talk to her. I got to be ready, I got to be serious. I have to have my cards in a row, cards in a row ducks in a row ducks in a row.
Tiffany:Cards in order I don't know, I don't know ready ready, so, um, it took till about march ish march ish, november to march.
Joey:Uh, I had a. I had a specific. You know this kind of goes back to I almost forgot. I wanted to connect it back to the phone call we got. By the way, if you want to call or text, if you have a specific question for tiffany and I or I, if you want to share something from your story, a praise report, a god moment, maybe you say you know what, man, I agree with what you said. God did that with me. I think that's the lord. 786-313-3157 8 6, 3, 1, 3, 3, 1, 1, 5.
Joey:I had a specific prayer list and I'm so grateful that I had that experience because I had a punch list. I said, lord, you know it's kind of like a fleece, almost. You know I need these things answered. I need these prayers answered because you know this means I'll be ready. You know I had credit card debt. I was able to pay that off to zero. I wanted to have the money for a ring. I don't think I had bought the ring yet, but I wanted to have money set aside for a ring. I bought you like a token, like a necklace, like almost like a promise ring type of thing, but it was a necklace, so there was some financial things.
Joey:I think I had already moved out at that time, I don't remember but there was a punch list of things that I I needed in order and the lord answered that prayer list, and that's when I knew it wasn't just feelings. Right, it was. Hey, I can back this up, I'm ready to move forward, I'm ready to provide.
Tiffany:I worked on a budget, all that stuff, and then I approached you for our second meeting and our friends sat at the next table, the same wendy's, but now we sat at our own table, at our, our own table, because we were grownups now. No, oh, whatever the Lord just led us to do it that way. I know people's stories are all different, but we really craved all of the wisdom from and that's another thing that, when I think back on our story, there were so many of our friends and godly father figures and mother figures that helped us along the entire way.
Joey:I'm so thankful for that. Older folks, older father figures and mother figures that helped us along the entire way. I'm so. Older folks, older men and women in the lord are man, it's. It's invaluable. Am I using that word correctly? I mean it's it's tremendously valuable it's, it's. There's no replacement for it, guys, I mean, and it's not just for relationships. If you're listening right now and and you're, no, yeah, you know a cute story, but I, I'm ticked off married kids. I'm I'm working on.
Joey:You know my work and it, man, whether it's uh, um, home ownership ministry, I mean anything in life. There's somebody that has gone through it, there's someone that has learned things and they can teach you something.
Tiffany:So back to you finally, that meeting was. You told me that you were ready to. You felt the lord leading you to to start a relationship with me, but you still needed to wait for my answer. You had to because I still hadn't said anything of like yeah well, you know, let me know. If you want to, then I'm willing, like you just said. Hey, you know, I'm ready to start a relationship I know what I want now and so you had, you had you know, knew where the lord was leading you.
Tiffany:So I said, okay, um, thank you for letting me know, I'm gonna pray and get back to you. And so that still wasn't the beginning.
Joey:And then it took her face, man, she was still wasn't ready to share my feelings.
Tiffany:So then I I wanted to keep just double, double, double check and pray and now, now, same thing.
Joey:You weren't doing this to mess with me, to get back to me, I just wanted to be really careful that I married the right person.
Tiffany:Like it's, that's just it's I want. I wanted to take it, but it's such a it's just an interesting detail.
Joey:It's an important detail, I think you know.
Tiffany:It needs to be said is all and not even that we were gonna like we weren't talking about getting married, we're talking about being in a relationship. But even that I wanted to tread very carefully, like I want to be really careful about. You know, this is it's not my life, it's the lord's. I want to make sure I'm doing you know what the lord wants me to do. So I wanted to really pray and I knew that if I did start a relationship with you, it was to pray about marriage. It wasn't just to like date, you know, for fun or anything. So I I remember talking to um, to pastor raz, and he said I went over their house and I talked to all these people and everybody was, you know, I was expecting like all of those like slow down, yes, and pray, like that I'd been hearing all my you know church life. But everybody was saying no, you know this, we see the lord in this, go for it. And I was like wow, like okay, you know, this is, these are the.
Joey:Who are you? What wait?
Tiffany:this is not what I expected? Yeah, so then finally, on Resurrection Sunday.
Joey:Resurrection Sunday Of 2015. I wake up to a text.
Tiffany:Yes.
Joey:Well, you got to say go ahead.
Tiffany:No, I like we'll say from your perspective. You wake up to a text from me at 6 am saying there's something for you in the mailbox something in the mailbox and it was a little glass vial yeah, it was a jar.
Joey:It wasn't a jar it was like the size of my finger.
Tiffany:Yeah, it was like a little tiny bottle that I had and it was this cute little thing I had made. I was like, now that the lord's finally giving me permission to tell him I want to do it in this really cute way this out my I like doing creative stuff. So I took a you know paper and, um, I did the whole like it was, like I tried to make it look like parchment and I rolled it up in there and when you opened it it said do you remember?
Joey:it said greek it was.
Tiffany:It was written in greek. You can't no reference. I don't even think you put vowel markers, oh, or like I just copied whatever I saw in blue letter bible, because I'm not the greek scholar here. You're supposed to be the Greek scholar.
Joey:So there's a phrase in Greek with no references, no punctuation marks, and I'm expected to translate this before church.
Tiffany:There was another note with it saying you know, translate this and let me know you know after church today what it says. What it says.
Joey:It was well, I don't remember the Greek for it, but it was uh.
Tiffany:Second corinthians 120 um for the promises of god in him are yes and in him are amen unto the glory. Yes of god, yes and amen.
Joey:And I put yes and amen underlined so and I, and I thought it was very cryptic yeah, and I told one guy and he's like that's not what I'm like, but maybe it means something besides yes and amen, amen. It's like bro chill, so, uh, so that was my end of the story, but that note got there somehow yeah, I, I, I put it, I put it in there the night before oh man, I just realized what time it is yeah, we have one minute left, but we we reached the point where it was resurrection resurrection sunday.
Joey:We met after church. She clarified that she meant yes yes and amen. The lord said um I was able to talk to her dad the same day, so I gave her the the preference. I don't know what you call it. I wanted to talk to her first, but then I said hey, I wanted to talk to you first, but I still want to talk to your dad and do it right.
Joey:Talk to her dad get the blessing. Talk to her dad. He did the dad interview on me. Well, what does that mean? How are you gonna? What are you gonna? What's your job? All that? And um, we might have to do a part two, because even you know, from there to engagement and marriage, I mean, that was another very special kind of like faith-filled, unique journey two fridays in a row.
Joey:I know it's hard and a big shout out to our friends that are helping us put this together. Um, uh, you know the kids are cared for and we're able to come to the studio. Uh, but I just want to pick up right where we left off to use the time effectively. Um, I think we left off on resurrection sunday. I finally talked to your dad and we were able to officially start courting. I don't hear that word used a lot anymore, but that's kind of what we grew up with. That's kind of the, the word that we use. That's kind of the mindset that we had. Maybe you want to share a little bit even on that.
Tiffany:Yes, it is, and it sounds like it is kind of an almost archaic term to use, because nowadays people just use um dating and I think um just kind of. And yeah, it was. So it became part of the culture at our church where we were at where and the. The intention in switching terms was to make it the focus less like oh, I'm just gonna like, you know, spend time with people that I like and and one-on-one and I'm gonna try this person and then no, I'm gonna try this person. And the dating culture um in our modern day is is more about um of the world the dating culture yeah of the world is it's.
Tiffany:It's not really so much like marriage intentioned as much as it is um, oh, I'm just having fun and like, and, and people will even say, um, you know you, you just this is what you do before you get married, before you even think about getting married, is you just like spend time with a lot of different people and you try out different people and you know you date and you have fun and then you settle down later and but the intention with courting is more like I I am looking for the person that I'm going to get married to, and this, you know, it's not that I'm trying to see how many people I can sort of be with, but the reason I'm with this person is to go in a direction that's intended toward marriage, and that's not to say that people who call it dating aren't doing that as well.
Tiffany:Right, it's just the reason why we were using that term.
Joey:Yeah, I suppose you know it's funny. You just kind of stumbled upon something interesting. I think there's another trend in the world right now where people want to get married later, they want to delay getting married or having kids, and I think, for the most part right we can't make generalizations too broad but I think, for the most part, when somebody is really seeking the Lord, they're willing and ready, right, hey, lord, you know, I know that for most people the plan is get married and have a family. You know we have scriptures in Genesis and in the New Testament about it, and so I know for most people that that's the plan, that's God's purpose and will for most people, and so they're ready.
Joey:You know, you almost have the other problem, for lack of a better term. You have the other side of the coin, when people are really locked into the Lord and we talked about it last week where they want to get married, they want to get married, they want to get married. They're so eager, they're looking, they're looking, they looking, they're looking, they're looking. Uh, and sometimes that could be a distraction as well, but but maybe someone's listening. That is delaying getting married is delaying. Um, yeah, getting married, basically having kids, is a whole other thing, but delaying getting married, tiffany, what would you say to that? I mean, when we got married, you were in your late 20s and, uh, it's not that you were delaying it, no yeah, it wasn't the intention, but but what comes to your mind when I mention that?
Joey:you know that kind of trend we see in the world.
Tiffany:Yeah, I. Just the problem I have with it is not so much the age but the intention behind it and the view that they have of marriage and having kids as like, okay, well, that's when the fun ends, or that's when you know I get serious, but before I get serious and settle down, I want to have fun, and so if that's the heart behind it, then that can really lead to a lot of regrets, I think, because you know again, as long as you're surrendered to the Lord, it might happen very quickly and I think when, as soon as I, as in the case of a certain couple in the studio today.
Tiffany:Yes, well, or what I meant was like early, like as soon as you're like, you know, in your twenties, which I thought, oh, I'll probably, like I could, totally I was ready for the Lord to like marry me off at 21.
Tiffany:Like my mom was, cause that's I love their story so much, but, um, but it didn't happen and I was okay with that. You know, I was surrendered to the lord, so he didn't have. It's not that it has to happen right away or it has to happen later, but it's the fact that you're surrendered to the lord and not just like, oh, lord, I'm gonna like push you off and to the side and I want to do my thing and then later on maybe I'll do like serious adult stuff. And then I think now a lot of those people are realizing that it's a little bit harder now to kind of get those years back and they're having a hard time getting finding a mate and they're, you know, or they're getting you know, having children at an older age and those kind of things. And there's different reasons perhaps that maybe now they're kind of regretting those decisions.
Joey:Yeah, you hit the nail on the head. I think it's. It's not the age right because god could do. Look at abraham right, but it's the saying no to the lord, no Lord, not yet Lord.
Tiffany:My time.
Joey:Yeah, my time, my plan, my way. So really, really important, I think. And again, tiffany even said it, right, she thought, or wanted to be married at 21, and instead it was 28. And so, yeah, I think we covered that pretty well. So, getting back to the story, so we started this courtship, this relationship.
Joey:If you guys remember, I had kind of been immature and I first approached Tiffany and so I wanted to really be serious. I told her hey, you know, I'm praying about marriage, I'm serious about the possibility of marriage. I might, honestly, I might, have said I want to marry you one day. I mean, I might have said something crazy like that. So I was serious, you know, serious, and so we spent time together.
Joey:I think I remember asking her dad and I think I remember her dad asking right, well, what is this courting thing, you know? And, uh, you know, um, I told him. I said, well, you know, and I had been prepared for that. I said, well, basically I, I want to be kind of like official, you know, in a relationship with her that that would be public, that would be known. And basically I want to be kind of like official, you know, in a relationship with her. That would be public, that would be known and basically I want to spend more time with her, spend more time with you guys, with the family, get to know everyone better, invest in the friendship, the relationship, just spend more time together pretty much. And he was approved. So you know anything from your side, tiff just starting a courtship, what that meant, something that I had forgot to mention.
Tiffany:Last forgotten to mention last time that I wanted to share were some of the verses that I had been getting before and after. So before, when we both liked each other and but nothing had been said yet you hadn't initiated anything. It was just kind of like I had these feelings for you. I said I had a lot of verses from the Lord saying put it to death, put it to death, put it, surrender it, put it to death.
Tiffany:And so there was just like all these verses about that. I'm like okay, I guess I just need to let go of this with no guarantee, no promise of like, oh, if you put it to death, then I'm going to make it, you know, bring it back to life one day, which, as now that you know. As a more mature Christian, now I see that the Lord does that so often with so many things. He asks us to put things on the altar, to sacrifice things, and he doesn't necessarily promise that, like Isaac, he's going to replace it and he's going to bring it back to life, but we just we're not doing it for that reason. Like, okay, well, this is just a hoop I have to jump through to get the thing I really want. And maybe some people out there are like okay, so for the way for this to work is I just have to tell the Lord that I'm okay with not having it and then He'll give it to me, which I think sometimes people try to like okay, God, what's the plan? What are the hoops I need to jump through? But that's not the reason why we do that. The reason is from a sincere, heartfelt, like Lord, I really do trust you and I really do surrender this to you and I can put it to death right now, this dream, this hope, and if you want to bring it back to life, that's up to you. But if you don't, lord, I'm still going to follow you, I'm still going to trust you, and so I did that. I was getting all those verses and then when you were kind of declared we had that, you spoke with me and you said you wanted to you that. You spoke with me and you said you wanted to. You knew what you wanted, you had heard from the Lord, and then I gave you the answer of you know, I didn't say yet like, oh, I have feelings for you too. All I said was okay, well, let me pray about it.
Tiffany:After that point, I started getting a bunch of verses about things coming back to life and resurrection, and again this was leading up to, like you know, easter Sunday, the idea of resurrection and so things about from darkness to light and coming back to life. So it was really cool. I'm like whoa, I'm getting all these verses now totally opposite from before. So I you know that was um, a lot of those verses that the lord confirmed to me to then go back to you and say, yes, um, so here we are, we're after easter, we started our courtship and then, um, we didn't really plan how long it was going to be. We were just kind of like, ok, we're now, we're courting, we're praying about marriage together. So, lord, what do you want? And I'm thinking like, oh, you know, like a typical courtship is like what? Like six months or something. Some people might even say longer, but the Lord had different plans for that as well, and it turned out to be much faster you know, I don't even remember how I don't remember how this all happened.
Joey:I have bits and pieces, so I remember being at the beach one day. You probably remember this too. Um, we're hanging out again. This is what we talked about. Hang out more. So it was with her family. I was at the beach with her family we're not engaged yet, mind you and her dad says something oh yeah, one of my tenants is moving out, so there's a place for you guys to rent, or something like that. Something super nonchalant, just like like we were talking about a hamburger. I mean, just like I go okay, that's how my dad does things.
Joey:Yeah, I was like oh, oh, okay, wilfred, cool, thanks, I did. I was like speechless, I didn't remember. I think I remember you weren't, it was just me, and him sitting on a bench oh, we, I was walking, or you had went walking or I think I was sitting, I don't remember.
Tiffany:We were not together, it was just you and him.
Joey:I thought I was sitting and you guys, the, the ladies had gone for a walk, so that was interesting. And you know, it's just, it's just interesting, you know, for for us, for our story, we knew, you know, we just knew we had been friends for a long time.
Joey:If you heard last week, and and we'll cut these together and kind of kind of put it up somewhere for for people that would like to listen. Um, you know, we we'd been friends for a long time and we had kind of gone through the gone through the motions is absolutely the wrong term I'm looking for, but gone through all of the ups and downs internally already. I think right I had settled it in my heart yeah and I think you had settled in your heart.
Joey:I love this person. I want to be with this person, you know, and just praying god confirm it, god confirm it, god confirm it, you know. Um. So so, before we continue, guys, this is refreshing and this is actually not a pre-recorded uh conversation or interview, believe it or not.
Joey:I'm here, live in the studio with tiffany, april the 12th, uh, friday afternoon, and if you want to call or text, if you're listening live on friday, april the 12th, and you're thinking what am I going to call or text about? You guys are talking about your story. Um, you might have a question hey, how did you do this? How did you do that? You might be in a relationship. Maybe you have a son or daughter and you're asking well, you know, how'd you do this? Or how can I advise my son or daughter on this? You might have questions that that maybe we didn't cover a detail and we can say, actually, you know what? Uh, yeah, let's, let's touch on that.
Joey:Um, you might have a prayer request. You might have a comment. You might say man, I really, I really resonate with that. I really see that. I really want to expound on that. We actually have somebody on the phone right now, so let me just give you the phone number for the next person that's going to call or text 786-313-315. So please feel free to jump in. This is meant to be a conversation, uh, if you want to jump in. So thank you for calling. Where are you calling us from today?
Joey:south miami heights great to hear from south miami heights. You know, I learned. I learned a lot of what to do right from this brother on the phone. I watched, I asked questions and he was even there when I made some big mistakes too, but he stuck around. But anyways, what did you want to say or ask?
Caller:No, I thought the question that came to mind was just the helpful things that the people around your life whether friends or any pastors or leaders or just anyone that was around your life that you thought was helpful during the time of staying pure, waiting on the Lord, and then the time of meeting this person and going forward and getting to know and eventually getting married.
Joey:what was the helpful parts any any helpful parts that you remember, whether it's advice or or or you know uh, things that someone did they, yeah no, I don't want to give suggestions, but just anything in general no, awesome question for real, thank you, we're gonna, we're gonna let the phone call go and and you continue to listen, and we're gonna address that question. Really good one, thank you, thank you.
Tiffany:Thank you, tiff, go ahead uh, it's cool because we were on last that last saturday, when we were doing the threads of grace, we touched a little bit on this question as well. Of of you know, I was saying how much I was so grateful for, for all those friends and you know, kind of spiritual dads and my own dad, parents and the people around us that were kind of helping us along the way. We were not in any way trying to do this by ourselves, like oh, let's figure it out you and me.
Tiffany:Every stage of the journey, we were like guys, please just let us know you know any advice, any wisdom, and you know all these Godly leaders around us. So some of the things were helpful. Things were to establish boundaries early on. Yes, because you don't want to wait in the moment when you're like, you know, in a situation that you're like, oh wait, maybe this is not a good idea. We should stop. You know, like, um, you know, whatever it might be, if it's like intimacy or something like that, they're like you need to establish boundaries early on about like how much time you spend together, whether you're, how much you're alone together, phone conversations, how long those last, at what time of the day or night those happen. Those kind of things like what, what to share, what kind of things that, at different stages of the relationship, is it wise to share?
Tiffany:so much, so personal information um and uh, and so that was really helpful that they were, that they advised us, you know, establish those boundaries early. And so we did. We had a conversation like okay, let's stay away from these things, and even along the way we had to kind of like backpedal a little bit. Yeah. Like okay, no, this is. We actually need to make the boundary a little bit more, like kind of bring this back a little bit, but we left ourselves a very wide margin of error.
Joey:That's what I was going to mention. Whatever boundaries you set up for yourself, and this is even in your own personal life.
Joey:right, as you set up guardrails for yourself. But whatever boundaries or guardrails you set up in a relationship, they're going to get bumped up against Right. The analogy is a car, right. If you're thinking about guardrails on a highway, you shouldn't be bumping on the highway guardrails in the car, but in a relationship and in life, they are going to get pushed. There's going to be pressure put on those standards, right, that you set, and so you want to set them, like you said, with a big margin of error, really closer than you need to, in a sense.
Tiffany:Where, if you accidentally kind of like, go over it a bit. You're not suddenly like oh man, now I'm doing something unbiblical.
Joey:Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, Really really good. And you're saying you got that from people around you.
Tiffany:Yes, I believe so. And then the other one was just those same people. We, we intentionally asked certain people. Like you know, I had certain ladies and you had certain guys were like, hey, ask me the hard questions and and I would, I would have to share stuff with them. You know, accountability that's that's what that word means. Having those accountability partners, they would actually come up and be like how are you doing in this area and how are you doing in this area?
Joey:And they would ask me and I would have to be honest with them- yeah, and for me, what I remember, and I see this to this day I like somebody texted. They said bumpers in a bowling alley could be a better analogy Because those, you know you're going to hit them, they're, they're meant to be hit. I like that they keep you on the lane. So for me, I as a, as a, as a guy again, let me not generalize I know, for me I had to be intentional, I had to make sure I was going to seek people out right. So I had accountability people, accountability partners, but they weren't hounding me all the time. I needed to be responsible and mature enough to go to them and say, hey, I want to give you an update. Here's what's going on, here's what went well this week.
Joey:Here's what we didn't do well this week. Here's what I need you to ask me about tomorrow, whatever it is. And even before I started in a relationship with tiffany, there was a brother that I, I, I I approached him with some uh stuff, um, you know, hey, I want to do this, I'm gonna do that, I'm gonna go do this, whatever I'm obviously being very generic on purpose. This was like a previous relationship kind of thing, and they said hey, I don't think you should do that and I don't think you should do that. Here's the reasons why I said no, but, uh, but I don't know, I don't know. And I did it anyway. And I actually did make regrettable decisions on that trip and I had to come back and tell them hey, you were right, you know you were right. And so in going through that with that person, I actually kind of learned to value their input more, if that makes sense, because they were proven right you know their counsel was proven true and so that was a big, a big deal too.
Joey:So it's kind of the good and the bad. I guess that's what I'm trying to get at. Having someone privy uh to the good and the bad. Having someone that you can be totally transparent with when you're trying to establish a relationship, work towards marriage and all that stuff.
Tiffany:The thing about this that I'm sure so many people in the world would say man, that's so legalistic. But that's when the focus is on others and not on yourself. What can I get out of this? How much enjoyment and pleasure can I get out of this person, out of this relationship? But when you shift the focus to that other person or to you know, when we were part of a church at that time and you were already like a pastor I, I think at the time, even you were, yeah, you were a pastor already, so we, we wanted to be extra, extra careful about our testimony. But even just for each other, if, for some reason, you know, we weren't guaranteed, like, okay, getting married. You know, the date wasn't set or anything. Yeah, we were in during our courtship.
Joey:Um, you have until the wedding day to turn around.
Tiffany:Yeah, we could still totally end up marrying different people and I wouldn't want to now like, end up, you know you marry somebody else and then you know like, oh well, I, oh yeah, you know, you don't want to have a history with a person that you go to church with that's married to somebody else. If that makes sense, like if we ended up marrying different people.
Joey:If possible, yeah, if possible.
Tiffany:You don't want to have like, oh, I, you know, yeah, I made out with that person and all these people and you kind of want to treat them like they might be somebody else's spouse until they are your spouse. Because you don't know for sure, until it's for sure, so they might be somebody else's spouse.
Joey:You want to treat them that way, um, and that's the loving thing to do yeah, and I would say at any age, because again you could have said well, I'm 20 something, I'm an adult, excuse me, I could have different standards, this, that, but not necessarily.
Tiffany:You know, it's more responsibility really with the more freedom yeah, and even leading up to before I met you, I, one of the things that I tried to keep in mind, to from my own purity of, like you know, as a teenager, as a young adult, is I want to love the man I'm going to marry even before I meet him and so I'm not gonna, you know, just be very, uh, free and liberal with you know who I kiss and all these things, because, like I want, I want to be as much as as I can, I want to love that man even before I meet him.
Joey:Yeah, thank you. We actually got a question here. They said the first one's not a question. They said yay, with lots of wise part two. And then they had a specific question. Great question After putting to death the idea of marriage and trusting it to the Lord, how did your life look on a day to day? How often did the urge for marriage resurface? So for me it was a little bit different, because I went through that before I seriously approached Tiffany. Once I approached her, I was, I was pursuing her. I knew that I wanted to marry her. I was kind of giving her time and space waiting on the Lord. So so I think you mentioned how you had to put it to death for a certain season. So if you can see the question from there and try to answer.
Tiffany:Yes, I'm trying to remember. I think I do remember that before I felt like I almost had to this idea of like putting something on the altar in the Bible it was usually an animal, but like I had to wrestle with it to kill it a little bit first. I'm like wrestling with this thing. I just remember there was a lot of emotions, a lot of angst, like lord and and I don't know, and um, a lot of tears and um. It was very difficult, but I think once I finally put it to death, there was a sort of freedom and I was really fully better able to to worship the Lord.
Tiffany:It's hard to describe, but I remember there was a really sweet season after I had finally put it to death and, you know, allowed the Lord to do that that I was like now going to church and worshiping and serving like, like I just was. I was free from all those distracting thoughts and the pullings that I was just. I had a really sweet closeness with the Lord during that time. I there was one of the times in my life where when I felt closest to the Lord and that's not to say that I probably had to like put it back to death a couple more times, Like I would have to. Sometimes you have to like bring those things back to the altar multiple times, but I do.
Joey:I do remember a sense of freedom and and closeness with the lord after I did I remember the same, uh, you know, before approaching you and making that commitment, I I remember the same, uh. They asked the follow-up question um, does it vary for male and female? I think I think it does, because I think biblically and we'll see here if I'm learning and understanding Tiffany and paying attention but I think she would agree that you know ladies are the recipients, you know men are the pursuers. Right, you need to initiate. So you're considering do I initiate with this person? Do I initiate with that person?
Joey:But there's so many layers to that and I think that question should be way down the road for a man. Oh, do I approach this girl? Why are you doing that? Is she your friend? Yet there's a lot that needs to happen before that. And that happened with us Friends for a long time. Serving the Lord, it wasn't. Oh, I see a pretty girl at church. Let me go talk to her because I may want to marry. Like, yeah, it's, it's, it's comes naturally out of seeking the lord and serving the lord. So I think that's how it's different for a man, that because you're the pursuer, there's a more of a drive or more of a um option for lack of a better word like yeah, you're, you're the one to make the first move, so, so I think that's how it's unique for for a guy. What would you say for for yourself?
Tiffany:as a lady, I do see the difference in there, in that I just I just kind of waited, like I didn't have to worry about, like, okay, so when do I talk to him, when do I?
Tiffany:I'm like, no, I'm just.
Tiffany:It was very clear for me from the lord to to just wait and not say anything, not hint at anything, not try to make something happen by, like you know, doing x, y and z, and I'm just like, you know, I'm just here, we're, we're friends, we're, you know, I'm gonna see what the lord does.
Tiffany:So it was, it's almost easier in a sense for us and kind of like it is in marriage, like I just submit, you know, to my husband and, um, while I do, you know, we do like make decisions together, but in a sense like, once I submit to my husband, then he, him and the lord, they'll figure it out, um, but maybe that analogy doesn't go with that. I don't know why it reminded me of that, but yeah, I guess in. In that sense I'm just kind of like, but once you know, if a guy approaches me and I'm there waiting, right, at that point I can say yes or no, or like you know, or I can put the brakes on, or I can be, like you know, whatever Be led by the Lord in that sense.
Joey:Well, I imagine, I imagine that it could be. It could be the, the wishing for right. Oh, I wish that guy would approach me. I wish someone would approach me, you know, and giving that desire to the lord lord, you know, help me to to the desire itself is is for marriage is something that I think everybody can surrender to the lord.
Tiffany:I think I've been listening a lot lately to elizabeth elliott and jim elliott and their story, and jim went into it already thinking like I am never getting married, I'm going to be a missionary. I'm going to die as a missionary. I'm going to die young, like all this stuff.
Joey:Which most of that he got.
Tiffany:true, yeah, but then except for the marriage part. The Lord did want him to get married and so down the road it was like five years where they were friends and like kind of break through to jim, like no, jim, you aren't actually gonna marry elizabeth. And then he had they met but not until she learned spanish right. Oh, that's a whole other story. You guys gotta listen to that. One's a great one uh.
Joey:So, getting back to, uh, our, our topic here, our story. Hey, let me just recap some stuff for you. If you just tuned in, my name is joey. I'm here with my wife, tiffany. Uh, every once in a while she's able to come to the studio and we thought, you know what? Let's take a couple fridays and just tell our story, share the testimony of what god has done, maybe answer questions for some people, give some some um, insight. You know a little bit that we've learned, uh, in our lives, uh, and just sharing the testimony.
Joey:So we're live here in the studio. Uh, april, the 12th friday, if you're listening on the podcast, then you can always reach out to us. And, related to that, somebody actually asked us how do I get a transcript of your, of the conversation? Well, on the podcast, actually, we provide transcripts for all of our podcasts, uh, for all of our friends and family podcasts. So if you know God's Way Radio, if you're a super fan, you know we produce a bunch of different ones. Not all of them provide transcription, but Friends and Family from God's Way Radio, the podcast titled Friends and Family, does provide transcripts and this will be on that podcast very soon, probably in a couple weeks I have to look at our release schedule, but just make sure you're following friends and family on the podcast. And then we got to go ahead, go ahead.
Tiffany:Oh no, I was going to say we should probably get a move on with the story.
Joey:Yes, we did get one more question, but I think we answered it a little bit.
Joey:It was kind of related to the how do you balance death, right, putting something to death as a male and still pursuing? So we talked about that a little bit again, just just giving it to the Lord, making sure that when you're in a group, when you're at church and you alluded to this as well Right, it's not about who am I going to marry, it's not about who do I like, it's not about who's a potential wife Right, as a, as a man, it's about man. I'm here to worship, I'm here to serve, I'm here to bless. I'm not here Because think about it, right, that view, that posture.
Joey:A lot of times it's kind of selfish Like I want to get married, I want to get married, I want to be married. It's very sort of thinking about yourself. So if you're thinking about others, the Lord will take care of it. So that question, we can go for hours and hours on that. But but hopefully it sheds a little bit more light. So we're in a relationship, we're spending time, we're hanging out at the beach. Your dad mentions hey, there's a, there's an apartment coming up. Okay, great, you know, I'm, you know. And then I remember at some point I was ready. You know, I may have even bought the ring already at this point and uh, and you know, I just wanted to do things real, real by the books shout out to yonko jewelers.
Joey:Yonko jewelers one of our sponsors at the station, uh, dear friend, and and uh, provided the bling on tiffany's uh finger. Um, so so I said, man, I want to go to work with your dad, you know, I want to spend the day working with them. You know, really, I don't know, maybe I was trying to prove something or something, who knows, I just thought it was a good idea. And then, and then I, you know, at the end of the workday, I said, hey, you know, and I wanted to talk to you and ask you, I want to propose to Tiffany. And basically he said something very similar to the first time. He said ah, you know, I knew this was coming. We wouldn't be here if I, if I, didn't approve of it, we wouldn't be this far if, if I wasn't okay with it. Yes, you have my blessing, you know? Um, I was kind of as simple as that. I mean, your dad is just a no nonsense guy.
Joey:I so appreciate him, appreciated him in that process. I appreciate him today, um anything else. I don't know why it's hard for me to remember. We just kind of kept doing a lot of what we were doing already went to church, we served, we hung out with our friends.
Tiffany:It was just a lot more together yeah during the courtship we talked a lot more, um, we got yeah, I guess that the conversations were more personal than they were when we were just friends, because you know, there's things you don't share with friends of the opposite sex that now we were sharing with each other, and then even more so when we got engaged. So you had so the engagement. I don't know, I don't think we have time to like share in detail, but I really was. It was so sweet the way it happened. I remember there were these two other dear friends of ours that were already married at the time, the same ones from the Wendy's.
Tiffany:Yes, the same couple that went with us to that Wendy's. They helped you out with your grand master plan of the engagement. But, my friend, she invited me to go to Fairchild Gardens in Miami and when I got there we were paying to go inside. And the lady hands me a little piece of paper and I was confused. At first I thought I had dropped it from my purse, that it was inside of my Bible or something, because when I looked at it it was one of the name tags from the many retreats you and I had gone to together that we had served in that ministry for so many years, and it was a name tag from that retreat.
Joey:Was it my name or your name? I don't remember.
Tiffany:I don't remember. I'm not sure. Yeah, I don't remember. I just remember the graphic was from one of the retreats, did we? Should I pause?
Caller:Yeah, let's pause, let's clean water and the route great to hear from my brother.
Joey:What do you want to share with us?
Caller:if you can make a brief, because we want to keep this to a two-parter and finish the story today, but I'm glad you called yes, as fast as possible thank you, thank you I get a call from a brother yesterday that he doesn't belong to our church, but he's a good, good brother. We grew up together.
Caller:We still talk to each other, he, we grew up in the church I used to belong to and we were able to talk a little bit. And the minute that we were able to talk, he told me George, I hope you're not in the same boat as you were before. Like I told you, what are you trying to say? Remember, you're going through some financial issues. I know you like to bless people with your finances and stuff. You have to give people this people that that's your gift. It's awesome, but please don't fall again in the trap, because you know I share that with you, because I have that issue and the Lord sometimes tells me how can you, how can you fight a war when you're injured?
Joey:Yeah, financially you're injured.
Caller:Yeah, financially You're injured right now. So now you've got to help yourself. Now you've got to get back together. Get back together and when you get back together, on track your finances and your 10, then you want to bless somebody. Bring it in.
Joey:But right now you're injured. Good reminder, good reminder, thank you. I want to remind that to the listeners and to myself. Thank you, bring it in. Yeah, right now you're injured.
Caller:good, good reminder, good reminder, thank you, thank you, thank you he came up to me and told me that and I go, don't go back, george, don't go back, please don't go back, you're injuring yourself yeah you're already injured. You're gonna injure yourself more. The lord's telling me to tell you that man, great, great praise report, great reminder.
Joey:You know it really connects to the topic today in a couple ways and I'll I'll mention it now. Thank you for calling. Sweetwater is always well represented. God bless you. You know that just goes back to accountability, having somebody that's going to call you out, you know, having those good friends. And then man, this idea that that I mean it touches on so many topics. But, man, you need to have a strong relationship with the Lord. If you have that desire, I want to get married. I want to get married and you don't read your Bible, you don't serve the Lord. Man, you want to strengthen up in the spiritual realm before you try to take on someone else.
Tiffany:I like how Ken Grace, I think, has put it master first, then your mission, then your mate.
Joey:I actually told that to the guys at the pet uh story yesterday. They said, so it's so funny, so short story. In the middle of the story I promise short. Oh, my goodness, see she's, she's a good accountability partner, she's gonna keep me on time, but uh, so this is a long story short. They were talking about like oh, they're so random. I mean it was such a god opportunity. It was two guys. One of the guys goes.
Joey:Man, I want to be a dad one day and then the other guys are like no, I don't think I want kids, and so I mean they're like talking to me basically about it. I go, man, kids are awesome. I go, but but you, you got to find a good woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they kind of died there. I said, you know, it's interesting man we have. Everybody has a master, you know. And I gave like a little like description and then I said master, mission may jesus. And then you have a purpose in life. So so, uh, yeah, you got to be ready to try to share, share the gospel. I, I don't know. I I tried to fit it into a couple minutes while the kids were running around the pet store.
Tiffany:I don't think they broke anything no, I brought home any animals that we're not aware of no, we only brought home plants. We better get home, get back on track. Here we were at a botanical gardens oh, that's why the plants. Okay, yes, and and so as we're walking around then you know I'm kind of like I had some sort of inkling. You know I'm like let me dress nice just in case, kind of thing, and so as I can never surprise you, you knew no, sometimes you do now I'm getting better at it.
Tiffany:um, we're walking around the park and I keep finding every. We would find different workers there and they would hand me a different, a little named tag or card from one of all the different retreats we had been at together. So that was really sweet. Until finally there was this beautiful part of the garden called the sunken gardens, where you would actually walk down and I heard the faint, uh sound of a sweet tones of a ukulele playing down at the bottom and my friend said go ahead, and she stayed behind and I walked down the steps and there's a waterfall at the bottom, surrounded by this dome of trees, and you were there playing your ukulele, because you played different instruments, and I sat on the bench and you serenaded me. You sang me a song.
Joey:I didn't think you were going to say this part of the story. It's a great part.
Tiffany:I know all the girls want to hear it and the guys need to hear it too.
Caller:It's nice when you can do something really sweet like that. It's my fault. I invited you to embarrass me, it's good.
Tiffany:And then after the song you proposed.
Joey:And.
Tiffany:I said yes, and you proposed, and I said yes, and then we went to a different garden. Yeah, we went to a whole a different botanical garden. That was like 45 minutes away to have sushi, but, and this time by ourselves by ourselves and we just spent the rest of the day together and then when we got back home, there was like a party at my house with all their friends I don't remember that part.
Joey:It was an engagement party. Man, awesome it was really. Was it your house or my house? I think it was my house oh man, I don't remember that part.
Tiffany:Everybody was there, glad you remember and then, um, yeah, and then after that, we, oh, that's when we were like, okay, we need to decide on a date and and it was either gonna be like, okay, well, we could either get married. We we got with that's when you were. We went to another beach now and we were there to alone together at the beach but there was a span of time.
Joey:So we're engaged. You know, you have the like right, the engagement buzz oh, you're engaged. Now You're engaged. Oh, you're showing your ring off. Oh, whatever, okay, and then it's okay.
Tiffany:Everyone's asking.
Joey:When's the date, when's the date right, and well, we don't know. Yeah, you know, one step at a time and um, and then we're kind of going down the list right, like okay, well, you know, before we get married we need a place to live check. Well, you know, we need to have a finances in order check. Oh, you know, we, we that's kind of it place to live finances in order.
Joey:Spiritually we're doing well. People were were green lighting. Hey, we see the lord and we see the lord in it. Okay, well, I guess now time to plan a wedding, right? How long does that take? And then, um, we realized we had kind of blackout dates going on right, so at our church, because of your role in ministry yeah, so at our church, uh, from november to december is very busy.
Joey:We have thanksgiving events, um, people travel a lot, so sometimes we have staff staffing, you know, is different. We have christmas, you know, so so it's usually really busy.
Tiffany:Um, so we realized that it would either be september, which this was in august, right, so it would either be in one in one month or in like five months like january, february, right, I think even january was busy too that year yeah, it might have been like spring or something so we said, okay, we need to decide, and if the one month is really an option, we need to decide right now yeah so then, so, yeah, we had, and it was sweet because I had, and you know I'll say this, because it was just she was such a such a special, sweet part of the whole engagement wedding planning process, especially missy sell um, she was there with me, you know, like she was one of the people that I had talked to before and she, she said, no, this is, I see the lord in this, and now I'm talking to her.
Tiffany:Okay, missy, so I have to plan a wedding. She's like, don't worry about it, like we're here for you. If you're gonna do this next year in spring, or if you're gonna do it in a month, we can do it. She's like I did my. My wedding happened in three days, so we can make it happen in a month if you need us to. But you just need to let us know, because after that we have married couples and this and this and then all these other things are planning all married couples.
Joey:That was a big one that you know. So we're like, okay, it was like the third week of september like.
Tiffany:So then we got together, we were at that other beach and we're like we need to decide if we're doing this in one month or waiting till next year. And we figured out.
Joey:So we drove out, just the two of us drove out, and I said, tiff, we can't leave this park, this beach, until we have a decision.
Joey:They didn't answer, you know literally that day, her parents were asking us. They said, hey, we're going to drive back to your parents' house and we're going to give them an answer tonight. You know, right, it's not fair to everyone else. So we went down the list again and we said you know, the only reason and and I think I asked you, I think I tried to get your, your heart on it where you know, my thing as a guy was I wanted to give tiffany her dream wedding.
Joey:Right, I wanted to to. I didn't want to skimp, I wanted to bless her and love her and honor her and and so, yeah, I could say, oh, yeah, let's go have a, you know, a sandwich in the park or whatever the courthouse. But that's not, you know. And guys, if you're listening and going, yeah, yeah, I just want to get married and get it over with and that's back up, jack, you know, because that's you're not ready. With all due respect, I would. I want some more information on that. So I wanted to do right by her, but she was saying no, I'm good. I'm good with whatever God wants, I'm good. Did you even say sandwiches at one point? I'm good with sandwiches? I think you were planning for sandwiches.
Tiffany:I think I just said like cake and punch.
Joey:Cake and punch. That was your line. Hey, we'll do cake and punch, because she was almost trying to come for me like no, it's okay, it's okay we're wrestling, we're wrestling, so she's good with it, I'm good with uh, with whatever the lord wants.
Joey:And so we realize the only thing that would keep us back from doing it in september is fear. We're worried, we're afraid. And then we said well, that's easy. The bible says fear is not of the lord, don't be afraid. He hasn't given you a spirit of fear. It looks like september, yeah we don't.
Tiffany:We don't like to make decisions based on fear, so so we knew, okay. Well, if we have all these people supporting us, saying they can make it happen in a month, Because everything else is ready.
Joey:Everything else is ready.
Tiffany:And I wasn't. You know, every girl is different. It's not wrong to want, like you know, the big grand wedding with the monogrammed napkins and things like that, but that just wasn't me. I was very simple then. Uh, yeah, we just we didn't want to make a decision based on fear. So we went back and we said, yep, we're going to do it in a month.
Joey:And her parents were like okay, Okay. Um, but everybody was on board them too, you know, and man, and then I mean going through some of the God stories of that. We had a couple that came to our church Tiff was okay with cake and punch, god wasn't, and uh, so, so she, she approached you. I think it was at church, after church actually, something I just remembered before that was.
Tiffany:It was so cool because even before, way before we had started our relationship, when it was getting to the point, or no, it was before we even started our courtship. It was at that point where I'm still praying and the Lord's giving me all those verses about coming back to life and bringing it to life. He told me that it was going to happen quickly and I didn't. I wasn't sure. I'm like is that the Lord, is that just me wanting it? So I wasn't sure. But the Lord said it's going to happen quickly. So I was already planning. I'm like, you know, not that it, and that's not to say that it's um, it's. I'm trying to distinguish that from like somebody who's like way too excited and they're just planning their wedding because you know they're just I just can't wait.
Tiffany:And you know it wasn't that it was just, it's not impatience it wasn't done out of impatience, it was the lord was urging me to like why don't you know? You're not very good at planning. Anyway, like try to like set up some things ahead of time, make some decisions ahead of time. So that way when you set that aside, put that you know over here to the side, and then, when the time comes, you have those things ready.
Joey:So okay, so I understand, if I can, if I can elaborate or try to rephrase it. You had some of the stuff that people wait to think about when they're engaged you already had thought about yes, hey, you know I like blue, or if I could have it my way, it would be in a park, or not, you know a theme and you know all these things.
Tiffany:That's really interesting, that's really. It's nice because I otherwise I'm I take a very long time to make decisions, so it was nice for me at least to have that super cool.
Joey:So so say, the god story about the food, oh, yeah.
Tiffany:so then we were ready to do, you know, cake and punch. And then this lady from our church who they, her and her husband own um, restaurants, um, that are more like Mediterranean, you know, cuisine. She said, listen, I have caterers and I have, you know, for our restaurants, we buy all these these things at wholesale prices. I just, the Lord, put it on my heart that I want to bless you guys. I want to take you with me, you know, to the store over here and you just get whatever you want and I'll use my, you know, the wholesale.
Joey:It will be at cost. At cost, yes.
Tiffany:And you can even use some of the service we have as cater, you know, to cater the wedding and I was like what?
Joey:So Tiffany and I had date. No, what was?
Tiffany:it.
Joey:Catered.
Tiffany:No, the specific thing that was so fancy grape. Oh yeah, grape leaves the, but with something, there's a word, there's a specific greek name for it, which, if you can text us, if you know the name of that dish, but it's like grape leaves that are. You know, they're wrapped in grape leaves and it's like something wrapped in grape leaves.
Joey:I was like this is this is so fancy. What is this? Yes, uh, if you do want to text us or call us. Thank you t, tiffany, for the reminder. You have a few minutes left. You might have a specific question. Maybe someone in your life that they're, like you know, pursuing marriage, or something. Maybe questions for yourself, whatever it is 786-313-3115. If you're listening on the podcast, reach out to us. Anyway. We won't get back to you live you know on the moment, but we will get back to you.
Tiffany:786-313-315 so, so you got the catering I mean the lord blessed us you know, feast, and then the other thing was the venue we had trouble finding a venue.
Joey:Again, just running through the story, uh, you know a brother that was coming to the church talking to him man, we can do it in this venue, it'd be really meaningful. We're gonna do it at a police memorial, which was kind of weird, but it was meaningful because I had also started chaplaincy ministry and my dad and law enforcement. We couldn't do it in the police memorial. So then I remember his brother said look, if we can't do it in the memorial, we can do it right outside, because they don't own it.
Joey:And I know the guy at the park and he, he was really insistent at that point and I said no, no, no, no, I don't want to make any waves, I don't want to ask for too much. And he was really insistent no, we're going to, we're going to. I said look, and he was like but not for if you're going to say no, you know I said no, I would be so much more than I can ask for, but I wouldn't push it, you know, he said, and then the other really sweet thing is how those people even found out about it, which is another step of faith that we took, and we probably it probably wouldn't happen again in our church, because we're a much smaller church.
Joey:But, we, but in that season of our church I was able to just invite the whole church.
Tiffany:Yes, and so we invited the whole church. It was really important to me to not leave people uninvited. Especially with you being a pastor and just different things on my heart. I'm like I don't want. I don't want this to happen and it's more important to me to have just open it up for everybody, rather than again to have a smaller you know, more intimate wedding with the monogram, napkins and the place settings and everything like it was just between the two priorities I want. I just wanted it to like. I want everyone to feel included and come not that there's anything wrong with the other.
Joey:Definitely not wrong with the other one and we and I think it also had a lot to do with the venue I think that it would have been hard or or even improper. I do believe that I think that the venue had a lot to do with it, where we invited kids and we opened it up pretty much. I don't think we put an age limit. I think we said whoever.
Tiffany:No, yeah, it's just whoever.
Joey:You know it was outdoors in a park and so I remember kids running, you know, kind of, you know within 100 feet of the ceremony, kind of running off in the trees and getting the energy out. You know, and I know it was the Lord that put it all together, because I could imagine people that wish they could invite kids and they just can't or the venue has rules or limitations too loud.
Joey:Yeah, yeah, so. So the lord brought it all together um and, and you know, pastor raz married us um. Pastor raz married us my. I had some of my family flying from colombia, from texas, from all over. Uh, all of tiffany's brothers were there um just an amazing time. So much of the church family was there.
Tiffany:What was so?
Tiffany:sweet was just because you know the timeframe was so short in a month to see the Lord's hand in all those details in the food in the venue, like the Lord was clearly in it because he was opening so many doors boom, boom, boom, boom, one after another, even like my dress was another one, that I don't have time to share the whole story. But again there's Missy. He used Missy sell again to find me like my dream dress, like a few days before the wedding and uh, everyone's kind of like my mom and we're like what are we going to do? Like we don't have a dress and I'm like I don't know, you know I had some actually other people had people had lent me dresses, I like I'll wear this if I have nothing else but my dream dress.
Tiffany:I'm like, well, if I could have anything, it would be this or that. And when I told missy so she, she just showed up one day. She's like, look, somebody want had this dress and they wanted you to use it. And so there was just so many of those stories that I remember that was like, wow, lord the lord is in this. Um, he wanted to honor the fact that, you know, we, we waited on him, that we didn't do anything out of fear, that. So it was just really sweet yeah the scripture says you know he?
Joey:he rewards those who diligently seek him. If you seek to lose your life, you'll find it. Um, and again we're we. We may let me speak for myself. My wife is amazing. She can chime in if she wants. I have made plenty of mistakes. I made plenty of mistakes in this process. I made plenty of mistakes since then. I will make mistakes again, but one thing that was consistent was that we just wanted to honor the Lord, obey the Lord. We just wanted the Lord. We really, really were excited to get married, but the most important thing was just obeying the Lord, honoring the Lord.
Tiffany:I don't know if you were going to share, but which reminds me of our wedding verse, our marriage verse. So, just when the focus is not so much on like, oh, let me just get my dreams and let me do things my way and let me, you know, the focus on self or even on each other, but when the focus is on the Lord, that was a great way kind of foundation for the rest of our marriage as well, that whole leading up to the marriage. But even now the marriage after Lord was everything we do is for the Lord's glory.
Joey:I want to end with the verse Go, but before the verse I want to kind of give a couple bullet points of summary. Walk in faith, live a life of faith. Fear is not of the Lord. Faith, live a life of faith. Fear is not of the lord. Um, you know, be, be, be settled content, be content whatever season of life you're at.
Tiffany:Um any, any bullet points that come to your mind just like yeah, being being submitted and surrendered to the lord's will, whatever that looks like marriage or no marriage, or late marriage or yeah awesome.
Tiffany:Close us with the verse my love so in second corinthians 120 it says for all the promises of god in him are yes, and in him amen to the glory of god. Through us, we hope you enjoyed friends and family, unique conversations recorded and produced in our studios, where you get a chance to hear what God is doing in people's lives. Jesus tells us in John 15, verse 15, I have called you friends For all things that I heard from my Father I have made known to you. So that's why we love to share these exclusive interviews with you. Our hope is that through their stories God will be made known to you. But you can only find them here on God's Way Radio. Just check GodsWayradiocom for our full program schedule.